Monday, March 23, 2009

3/23 Gosseliin Season Finale!

B-Ball & More
The Gosselin family goes to see the Harlem Globetrotters, but there's more in store than just amazing basketball! (I hope the rumors are true that they got booed!)

Family Outing
The Gosselin clan heads to a unique museum where the kids learn and explore through tactile exhibits designed for touching. It's a day of feel good fun for the whole family (Paid for by TLC and I am sure with the VIP treatment!)!

We’re just going to lump all this hot mess together.

The first episode of the night boiled down to shopping, haircuts, Harlem Globetrotters and lies.
The kids are going to Oprah so they all need hair cuts. “It’s our live- pack unpack pack again.” We must coordinate, says Kate in her annoying monotone. Jon said he was helping his mother during this time because she had a broken foot and her husband was gone.

Kate and Jon have a “helper” (seems to be more part time than full time and isn’t really a nanny.) According to Kate, “We have a helper, we do not have a nanny, we will never, ever have a nanny….” Whhhhhat? What about nannies4hire? Jenny? Others?

Just so you know:
According to
The Free Dictionary a nanny is, “a woman whose job is looking after young children.” Hmmmm

According to
American Nannies , a nanny is, “A nanny is a person whose primary and sometimes only function is limited to caring for the children.

According to
WordNet from Princeton University (yes, that one), a nanny is, “a woman who is a custodian of children.” You be the judge.

“We always eat organic”, “we will never eat fast food.” Also famous lies, er quotes from Kate.

Kate waxes on about how she feels now that the kids are getting older. She says she’s lonely when they are “dispersed” in the house- they are “like growing up”. Yep, that would be what it is! And she graces us with her laughing cow expression when remembering her bad fashion choices of the past (for us non-star folk, that means before she had a wardrobe guru and a PR rep). Kate admits she LOVES shopping.

The nanny, let’s just be honest, doesn’t want to be on camera- or else she had to sign an agreement, which is what I think. So while Kate shopped, the kids stayed with a babysitter. At the last minute, it was decided the Oprah show would be via satellite. Kate had to shop for NEW outfits for all the kids. I have no idea why.

Then it was off to get hair cut. Hannah wanted her hair cut and Kate said no. Cara wanted to keep her hair and Kate said no. It’s clear who is still the favorite.

Before they saw “Oprey” again, they went to a Harlem Globetrotters session. You can’t begin to get me to swallow that the Harlem Globetrotters are huge fans of Jon and Kate Plus 8. Why, is there no mention of the Gosselins on the HGT website—a fav link might be a good thing on your website if you endorse them, Harlem Globetrotters, if they are your FAVORITES!

By the way, if you are outraged that the favored Gosselins got to meet the Trotters and not the special needs kids, here is their contact info:

Harlem Globetrotters
400 E. Van Buren #300
Phoenix, AZ 85004
Phone: 800-641-HOOP
Fax: 602-258-5925

Nichole Tillman is the VP of Publicity- I’d start there. Or try Kelley Lovell-Taylor, VP of Sales and Marketing.

According to the HGT website: “The Harlem Globetrotters are owned by Shamrock Capital Growth Fund. Shamrock, based in Burbank, Calif., is the investment entity of the Roy E. Disney family, founded in 1978 by Mr. Disney and Stanley P. Gold, Shamrock’s president and chief executive. “ Just in case you want to know who is truly responsible for their actions.

Jon put a blatant plug in for Allstate, right after we came back from commercial break, with (you guessed it) an Allstate commercial. Yeah, like Jon’s comment was spontaneous. “I have to do a lot of work this afternoon. My Allstate agent said…..” Whatever, eunuch.

Kate called the HGT “stupid fun”. Great way to treat your “fans”, Kate. I swear this woman has diarrhea of the mouth. Although we didn’t hear the boos we were told were part of the HGT session, be aware that sound editors can edit quite a bit out- as can video editors. But also notice that there was voice over from Jon and Kate when all the kids were taken out onto the floor—masking boos? And I don’t understand Cara being the chosen one. Let’s ignore Mady. Mady gets braces, Cara gets special meet and greets. Nice that they get swag from HBT. I’m sure other deserving folks would like a chance. Moving on….

During “Family Outing” Jon was “on a trip” and the kids were going to make paintings for him. They went to a Touch Museum. The “trip” was supposedly to his mom’s house because her foot was broken.

Jon has gained a lot of weight. His face has become quite round. Like the balls he’s missing.

Kate whines about the couch and then talks about making paintings. Kate talked about the studio being “paint covered” like it was the crabs or something. Kate then admits she wants art for her walls in the colors she wants (we all KNEW the paintings weren’t for Jon, didn’t we?). Kate had to choose colors—so they would match her home. Why not just let the kids be KIDS for once? Too much for your OCD nature, Kate? I am sure Jon missed out on all of this while he was partying with the sorority chicks.

Kate decided to tune everything (meaning the paint mess) out by painting her own canvas- that’s what they used to do in mental institutions back in the day, too. Kate, of course, shows her off first. Kate rolled her eyes when Jon complemented the paintings and said they could hang in Soho. What an idiot she is.

When they did the museum trip, Jon kept saying how much he had to help his mother, who had a broken foot and needed help. Again. So they go through the museum, Kate freaks out about the kids getting wet. What do you expect?

Ahhh and what we’ve been teased about: Kate is ready for season 5. Jon is having a problem being Jon when he has a public image to uphold as J & K Plus 8. They are at an “odd place” because they can’t go back to anonymity (really? Yes you can. STOP THE SHOW.) Jon kept saying it is all difficult for him to be a stay at home dad and Kate is happy with the course of things. (Hint, Jon: Get. a. job. ) Since we know they’ve signed on for Season 5 and because Kate is happy, they will be back, you can be sure of that. I wonder what ever happened to if it becomes a bad thing for the family that they will quit?

Oh, and I saw a preview for Table for 12 (yes, I know it aired already) but there seems to be an awful lot of product placement for Ragu. I am sure this family will go the same route as Jon and Kate- sellouts.